I WAS A WITCH!
by Jeff
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.

 

Four young bitchin' witches, ready to destroy the patriarchy

Tenement - "Witches in a Ritual"

Simon pulled at the door, but it wouldn't open. He looked up at the flimsy sign, the words Occulter's Magick Shoppe printed in red on corrugated plastic.

This was where he'd been initiated into in the magick arts. He joined the after-school coven. They met in the aquelarre, which was also the stock room, behind black velvet curtains. It was a new world to him, of spells and lore. He was the only wizard in a circle of witches with skunk-stripe centre-parts in their dyed black hair. They wore black lipstick, had ankhs painted on their cheeks, and talked about boys in ways that delighted Simon.

Sheila called them to order when they gossiped too much. Exhaling a cloud of clove cigarette smoke she would exclaim "Silencio!" and gesture with the dog-eared book of spells in her hand. It was the knowledge she'd imbibed from these pages that gave her the authority over their coven, but she was only a teenager, like the rest of them.

Simon stood back and tried to look in through the tinted glass to the store, but all he saw was his own reflection. Like every other Tuesday he'd stopped at the park and donned his polyester cloak - purchased at the fan convention back when he was but a lowly Dungeonmaster - and applied the eyeliner he'd stolen from Shopper's using his locker mirror.

"Greetings, dark lord."

"M'lady witch," Simon spun around and bowed gallantly to Sheila. But as he righted himself he was surprised by what she was wearing. It was the first time he'd seen her out of her cape. She was wearing raver pants, a belly shirt, and a baby backpack.

"The coven is over."

"Indeed," Simon nodded gravely. His magic education was at an end.

"Have you ever tried bubble tea?"

"No," Simon dropped his affectation, speaking with his regular voice.

"Come on," she said, gesturing him over. "Let's go get some. I think you'll like it."

--

So the best new punk is basically boogie-rock now, and that's fine with with me. Tenement's "Witches in a Ritual" is in the running for song of the summer.

[bandcamp / buy the LP]

Posted by Jeff at August 9, 2016 4:13 PM
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Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.

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