by Jeff
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.


Four young bitchin' witches, ready to destroy the patriarchy

Tenement - "Witches in a Ritual"

Simon pulled at the door, but it wouldn't open. He looked up at the flimsy sign, the words Occulter's Magick Shoppe printed in red on corrugated plastic.

This was where he'd been initiated into in the magick arts. He joined the after-school coven. They met in the aquelarre, which was also the stock room, behind black velvet curtains. It was a new world to him, of spells and lore. He was the only wizard in a circle of witches with skunk-stripe centre-parts in their dyed black hair. They wore black lipstick, had ankhs painted on their cheeks, and talked about boys in ways that delighted Simon.

Sheila called them to order when they gossiped too much. Exhaling a cloud of clove cigarette smoke she would exclaim "Silencio!" and gesture with the dog-eared book of spells in her hand. It was the knowledge she'd imbibed from these pages that gave her the authority over their coven, but she was only a teenager, like the rest of them.

Simon stood back and tried to look in through the tinted glass to the store, but all he saw was his own reflection. Like every other Tuesday he'd stopped at the park and donned his polyester cloak - purchased at the fan convention back when he was but a lowly Dungeonmaster - and applied the eyeliner he'd stolen from Shopper's using his locker mirror.

"Greetings, dark lord."

"M'lady witch," Simon spun around and bowed gallantly to Sheila. But as he righted himself he was surprised by what she was wearing. It was the first time he'd seen her out of her cape. She was wearing raver pants, a belly shirt, and a baby backpack.

"The coven is over."

"Indeed," Simon nodded gravely. His magic education was at an end.

"Have you ever tried bubble tea?"

"No," Simon dropped his affectation, speaking with his regular voice.

"Come on," she said, gesturing him over. "Let's go get some. I think you'll like it."


So the best new punk is basically boogie-rock now, and that's fine with with me. Tenement's "Witches in a Ritual" is in the running for song of the summer.

[bandcamp / buy the LP]

Posted by Jeff at August 9, 2016 4:13 PM
Post a comment

(Please be patient, it can be slow.)
about said the gramophone
This is a daily sampler of really good songs. All tracks are posted out of love. Please go out and buy the records.

To hear a song in your browser, click the and it will begin playing. All songs are also available to download: just right-click the link and choose 'Save as...'

All songs are removed within a few weeks of posting.

Said the Gramophone launched in March 2003, and added songs in November of that year. It was one of the world's first mp3blogs.

If you would like to say hello, find out our mailing addresses or invite us to shows, please get in touch:
Montreal, Canada: Sean
Toronto, Canada: Emma
Montreal, Canada: Jeff
Montreal, Canada: Mitz

Please don't send us emails with tons of huge attachments; if emailing a bunch of mp3s etc, send us a link to download them. We are not interested in streaming widgets like soundcloud: Said the Gramophone posts are always accompanied by MP3s.

If you are the copyright holder of any song posted here, please contact us if you would like the song taken down early. Please do not direct link to any of these tracks. Please love and wonder.

"And I shall watch the ferry-boats / and they'll get high on a bluer ocean / against tomorrow's sky / and I will never grow so old again."
about the authors
Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.

Emma Healey writes poems and essays in Toronto. She joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. This is her website and email her here.

Jeff Miller is a Montreal-based writer and zinemaker. He is the author of Ghost Pine: All Stories True and a bunch of other stories. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Say hello on Twitter or email.

Mitz Takahashi is originally from Osaka, Japan who now lives and works as a furniture designer/maker in Montreal. English is not his first language so please forgive his glamour grammar mistakes. He is trying. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Reach him by email here.

Site design and header typography by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet. The header graphic is randomized: this one is by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet.
Dan Beirne wrote regularly for Said the Gramophone from August 2004 to December 2014. He is an actor and writer living in Toronto. Any claim he makes about his life on here is probably untrue. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.

Jordan Himelfarb wrote for Said the Gramophone from November 2004 to March 2012. He lives in Toronto. He is an opinion editor at the Toronto Star. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.
our patrons
Said the Gramophone does not take advertising. We are supported by the incredible generosity of our readers. These were our donors in 2013.
watch StG's wonderful video contest winners

our favourite blogs
(◊ means they write about music)

Back to the World
La Blogothèque
Weird Canada
Destination: Out
Endless Banquet
A Grammar (Nitsuh Abebe)
Ill Doctrine
A London Salmagundi
Words and Music
Petites planétes
Gorilla vs Bear
Silent Shout
Clouds of Evil
The Dolby Apposition
Awesome Tapes from Africa
Matana Roberts
Pitchfork Reviews Reviews
i like you [podcast]
Nicola Meighan
radiolab [podcast]
CKUT Music
plethoric pundrigrions
Wattled Smoky Honeyeater
The Clear-Minded Creative
Torture Garden
Passion of the Weiss
Juan and Only
Horses Think
White Hotel
Then Play Long (Marcello Carlin)
Uno Moralez
Coming Up For Air (Matt Forsythe)
my love for you is a stampede of horses
It's Nice That
Song, by Toad
In Focus
WTF [podcast]
The Rest is Noise (Alex Ross)
My Daguerreotype Boyfriend
The Hood Internet

things we like in Montreal
st-viateur bagel
café olimpico
Euro-Deli Batory
le pick up
kem coba
le couteau
au pied de cochon
mamie clafoutis
tourtière australienne
chez boris
alati caserta
vices & versa
+ paltoquet, cocoa locale, idée fixe, patati patata, the sparrow, pho tay ho, qin hua dumplings, caffé italia, hung phat banh mi, caffé san simeon, meu-meu, pho lien, romodos, patisserie guillaume, patisserie rhubarbe, kazu, lallouz, maison du nord, cuisine szechuan &c

drawn + quarterly
+ bottines &c

casa + sala + the hotel
blue skies turn black
montreal improv theatre
passovah productions
le cagibi
cinema du parc
pop pmontreal
yoga teacher Thea Metcalfe

Cult Montreal
The Believer
The Morning News
The Skinny