One Thumper, One Humper
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.
There are some things you think, that, once you think them you can't stop thinking them until they're somehow expunged from your mind's crowded corkboard. SHERYL CROW FUCKS TEENAGE OASIS. Like pornography, or animal meat, or like a horrifying imaginary thing, it sticks there, waiting for a cue to exit, a loud and singular signal. SHERYL CROW FUCKS TEENAGE OASIS. It's not horrifying, it's only slightly pornographic, and it doesn't need something to die. It's actually kind of nice. Like in the pleather back seat of a classic car, in the 90s, or in a place without time altogether. SHERYL CROW FUCKS TEENAGE OASIS. Maybe I need to go there, to dream it fully out, to run with lit flares towards it shouting, to interrupt it, to see it break, maybe that will get rid of it. Or maybe it won't ever leave, maybe it's something like the shape of my skull or the sound of my voice, it will sit like a watermark on my vision, play on loop in my ears until it fades along with every other sense. And I might not mind that.
I overheard a couple of indeterminate age having this exchange on a long bus ride. It seemed to be a game, the rules of which I couldn't discern. "Fatty Acids," he said. She replied with, "Fat Acid Heads." He pursed his lips, "Hallucinating Hobbits." She bit right back, "Juggalo Baggins!" He laughed, and said, "Bilbo Baguette." She thought for a long time before, "Beret Charles." "The Blind Chaplain." Tapped her fingers, tasted the full long answer, "Counselor Geordi Troi La Forge." "Hm," he said, and looked out the window. But outside all there were were dark black trees. "New Enterprises, Old Psychics." She thought, and looked up like she were silly for not seeing it right away, "Memory Banks." "Ha," he said, "more like Memory Credit Unions." "Yes," she said, pulling the arm rest between them, "but that wouldn't make sense."
(autographed photo of Marina Sirtis)Posted by Dan at November 21, 2011 10:05 PM
I never overhear conversations like this.Posted by aireanne at November 22, 2011 7:51 PM
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"And I shall watch the ferry-boats / and they'll get high on a bluer ocean / against tomorrow's sky / and I will never grow so old again."
about the authors
Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.
Emma Healey writes poems and essays in Toronto. She joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. This is her website and email her here.
Jeff Miller is a Montreal-based writer and zinemaker. He is the author of Ghost Pine: All Stories True and a bunch of other stories. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Say hello on Twitter or email.
Mitz Takahashi is originally from Osaka, Japan who now lives and works as a furniture designer/maker in Montreal. English is not his first language so please forgive his glamour grammar mistakes. He is trying. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Reach him by email here.
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Dan Beirne wrote regularly for Said the Gramophone from August 2004 to December 2014. He is an actor and writer living in Toronto. Any claim he makes about his life on here is probably untrue. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.
Jordan Himelfarb wrote for Said the Gramophone from November 2004 to March 2012. He lives in Toronto. He is an opinion editor at the Toronto Star. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.
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our favourite blogs
(◊ means they write about music)
Back to the World
La Blogothèque ◊
Weird Canada ◊
Destination: Out ◊
A Grammar (Nitsuh Abebe) ◊
Ill Doctrine ◊
A London Salmagundi
Words and Music ◊
Petites planétes ◊
Gorilla vs Bear ◊
Silent Shout ◊
Clouds of Evil ◊
The Dolby Apposition ◊
Awesome Tapes from Africa ◊
Matana Roberts ◊
Pitchfork Reviews Reviews ◊
i like you [podcast]
Nicola Meighan ◊
CKUT Music ◊
Wattled Smoky Honeyeater ◊
The Clear-Minded Creative
Torture Garden ◊
Passion of the Weiss ◊
Juan and Only ◊
Then Play Long (Marcello Carlin) ◊
Coming Up For Air (Matt Forsythe)
my love for you is a stampede of horses
It's Nice That
Song, by Toad ◊
The Rest is Noise (Alex Ross) ◊
My Daguerreotype Boyfriend
The Hood Internet ◊
things we like in Montreal
le pick up
au pied de cochon
vices & versa
+ paltoquet, cocoa locale, idée fixe, patati patata, the sparrow, pho tay ho, qin hua dumplings, caffé italia, hung phat banh mi, caffé san simeon, meu-meu, pho lien, romodos, patisserie guillaume, patisserie rhubarbe, kazu, lallouz, maison du nord, cuisine szechuan &c
drawn + quarterly
+ bottines &c
casa + sala + the hotel
blue skies turn black
montreal improv theatre
cinema du parc
yoga teacher Thea Metcalfe
The Morning News