Assorted Creations
by Dan
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.


Parasites of the Western World - "Mo"

This story is a procedural. It follows all the steps that make up a comforting list of familiar benchmarks in the revelation of a set of motivations and actions. In the unfolding of the Preakness, an invisible and immovable wire had been stretched across the track, and as all the horses hit it, one by one, they were split open, and the jockeys legs were halved, bodies and flesh of all kinds strewn in the soft mud of the racetrack. Only the final two horses in the race were able to stop in time. All the interested parties were questioned, owners, spectators, track maintenance, nothing was found. Until the surviving jockeys were questioned, when Arms Japper, 2nd last place, showed himself to be a sight less distraught than Ham Niggs, last. Which piqued the interest of lead investigator Gomenesai Woods. "The order of their standings is what gave it away," said Woods, acting both as detective and crown attorney, "Second-last was not supposed to survive, only last place was supposed to make it out alive." The crowd in the courtroom hushed, the jockey tearfully confessed, the horse turned about-face and stormed out, betrayed. Sentences were handed out like flower necklaces, and Woods returned home to bed, still a failure to his wife, still a cripple and a drunk. [Buy from De Stijl records]

The Black Angels - "The Sniper"

We're only gonna hear from aliens when they need help. When the bums of the universe come callin' they're gonna be lookin' for a goddamn hand-out. Life, if you look at the numbers, is a rare thing in outer space, and it needs plenty of shit to keep itself going. Not room enough for the two of us, aliens, sorry, tough beans. [Out Today]

Posted by Dan at September 14, 2010 3:09 PM

Your attitude towards extra-terrestrials is gutsy at the very least.

Posted by Sean at September 14, 2010 8:54 PM


Posted by Tim at September 14, 2010 11:12 PM

Good to see how well the Tea Party translates to galactic politics

Posted by Mike at September 14, 2010 11:16 PM

Man, I bet Roddy Puke woulda got away with it.

Posted by Ryan at September 15, 2010 6:04 PM

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about said the gramophone
This is a daily sampler of really good songs. All tracks are posted out of love. Please go out and buy the records.

To hear a song in your browser, click the and it will begin playing. All songs are also available to download: just right-click the link and choose 'Save as...'

All songs are removed within a few weeks of posting.

Said the Gramophone launched in March 2003, and added songs in November of that year. It was one of the world's first mp3blogs.

If you would like to say hello, find out our mailing addresses or invite us to shows, please get in touch:
Montreal, Canada: Sean
Toronto, Canada: Emma
Montreal, Canada: Jeff
Montreal, Canada: Mitz

Please don't send us emails with tons of huge attachments; if emailing a bunch of mp3s etc, send us a link to download them. We are not interested in streaming widgets like soundcloud: Said the Gramophone posts are always accompanied by MP3s.

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"And I shall watch the ferry-boats / and they'll get high on a bluer ocean / against tomorrow's sky / and I will never grow so old again."
about the authors
Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.

Emma Healey writes poems and essays in Toronto. She joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. This is her website and email her here.

Jeff Miller is a Montreal-based writer and zinemaker. He is the author of Ghost Pine: All Stories True and a bunch of other stories. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Say hello on Twitter or email.

Mitz Takahashi is originally from Osaka, Japan who now lives and works as a furniture designer/maker in Montreal. English is not his first language so please forgive his glamour grammar mistakes. He is trying. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Reach him by email here.

Site design and header typography by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet. The header graphic is randomized: this one is by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet.
Dan Beirne wrote regularly for Said the Gramophone from August 2004 to December 2014. He is an actor and writer living in Toronto. Any claim he makes about his life on here is probably untrue. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.

Jordan Himelfarb wrote for Said the Gramophone from November 2004 to March 2012. He lives in Toronto. He is an opinion editor at the Toronto Star. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.
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Said the Gramophone does not take advertising. We are supported by the incredible generosity of our readers. These were our donors in 2013.
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our favourite blogs
(◊ means they write about music)

Back to the World
La Blogothèque
Weird Canada
Destination: Out
Endless Banquet
A Grammar (Nitsuh Abebe)
Ill Doctrine
A London Salmagundi
Words and Music
Petites planétes
Gorilla vs Bear
Silent Shout
Clouds of Evil
The Dolby Apposition
Awesome Tapes from Africa
Matana Roberts
Pitchfork Reviews Reviews
i like you [podcast]
Nicola Meighan
radiolab [podcast]
CKUT Music
plethoric pundrigrions
Wattled Smoky Honeyeater
The Clear-Minded Creative
Torture Garden
Passion of the Weiss
Juan and Only
Horses Think
White Hotel
Then Play Long (Marcello Carlin)
Uno Moralez
Coming Up For Air (Matt Forsythe)
my love for you is a stampede of horses
It's Nice That
Song, by Toad
In Focus
WTF [podcast]
The Rest is Noise (Alex Ross)
My Daguerreotype Boyfriend
The Hood Internet

things we like in Montreal
st-viateur bagel
café olimpico
Euro-Deli Batory
le pick up
kem coba
le couteau
au pied de cochon
mamie clafoutis
tourtière australienne
chez boris
alati caserta
vices & versa
+ paltoquet, cocoa locale, idée fixe, patati patata, the sparrow, pho tay ho, qin hua dumplings, caffé italia, hung phat banh mi, caffé san simeon, meu-meu, pho lien, romodos, patisserie guillaume, patisserie rhubarbe, kazu, lallouz, maison du nord, cuisine szechuan &c

drawn + quarterly
+ bottines &c

casa + sala + the hotel
blue skies turn black
montreal improv theatre
passovah productions
le cagibi
cinema du parc
pop pmontreal
yoga teacher Thea Metcalfe

Cult Montreal
The Believer
The Morning News
The Skinny