There Would Have Only Been One
by Dan
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.


Relief Maps - "Hair Play"

This sentence took an hour to write. It took me three days to eat yesterday's breakfast, 8 months to read a too-thumbed copy of "Shampoo Planet", 2 years to break it off with my old flame from Ottawa. It takes me a long time to do a lot of things. It took me 3 weeks to watch Midnight Cowboy, 9 tries before I could listen past track 4 on Lonesome Crowded West, it took me honestly forever to get through 8th grade. I takes me a long time to do a lot things. But I can grow my hair like a motherfucker. I don't even have to try at it sometimes, but when I do, it's even faster. Some days I'll go with a thick pony tail, the next day a military crew cut, and the next I'll go with waist-length straight locks. Some days it's full beard, then clean shaven, then powerful goatee, and that's in a day. On cold days I can increase my natural warmth, and on hot days, I can be completely smooth and breezy. I can do designs, text, and even photos if you let me look at it long enough. It's the thing I'm best at, so it's certainly a pleasure to watch me work. Just like it is an utter pleasure to listen to Relief Maps do what they're best at: steady, crashing, warbly rock that is at once humble and brashly talented. [Buy from the MySpace]

Ima Fucking Gymnist - "We're Professionals"

I picture 14-year-old girls in dark overcoats that are too big for them, and old value village fedoras and fake moustaches and umbrellas and briefcases just walking around the stage in this exaggerated "oh, excuse me sir, no excuse ME sir, I have very important tasks to do" kind of way. It sounds like the soundtrack to a clown act, one that ends with burning all the money that the audience paid to get in. Whatever it actually is I hope they're as cool as I think they are. [Buy from olFactory]


Also: do not miss Sean's Rye Rye post from yesterday. Oh my, yes.

Posted by Dan at September 19, 2008 11:15 AM


Posted by lechner at September 23, 2008 11:58 PM

Oh, thanks for pointing me to the Rye Rye song. I missed it!

Posted by vinny at September 24, 2008 11:00 AM

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about said the gramophone
This is a daily sampler of really good songs. All tracks are posted out of love. Please go out and buy the records.

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All songs are removed within a few weeks of posting.

Said the Gramophone launched in March 2003, and added songs in November of that year. It was one of the world's first mp3blogs.

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"And I shall watch the ferry-boats / and they'll get high on a bluer ocean / against tomorrow's sky / and I will never grow so old again."
about the authors
Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.

Emma Healey writes poems and essays in Toronto. She joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. This is her website and email her here.

Jeff Miller is a Montreal-based writer and zinemaker. He is the author of Ghost Pine: All Stories True and a bunch of other stories. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Say hello on Twitter or email.

Mitz Takahashi is originally from Osaka, Japan who now lives and works as a furniture designer/maker in Montreal. English is not his first language so please forgive his glamour grammar mistakes. He is trying. He joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. Reach him by email here.

Site design and header typography by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet. The header graphic is randomized: this one is by Neale McDavitt-Van Fleet.
Dan Beirne wrote regularly for Said the Gramophone from August 2004 to December 2014. He is an actor and writer living in Toronto. Any claim he makes about his life on here is probably untrue. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.

Jordan Himelfarb wrote for Said the Gramophone from November 2004 to March 2012. He lives in Toronto. He is an opinion editor at the Toronto Star. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.
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our favourite blogs
(◊ means they write about music)

Back to the World
La Blogothèque
Weird Canada
Destination: Out
Endless Banquet
A Grammar (Nitsuh Abebe)
Ill Doctrine
A London Salmagundi
Words and Music
Petites planétes
Gorilla vs Bear
Silent Shout
Clouds of Evil
The Dolby Apposition
Awesome Tapes from Africa
Matana Roberts
Pitchfork Reviews Reviews
i like you [podcast]
Nicola Meighan
radiolab [podcast]
CKUT Music
plethoric pundrigrions
Wattled Smoky Honeyeater
The Clear-Minded Creative
Torture Garden
Passion of the Weiss
Juan and Only
Horses Think
White Hotel
Then Play Long (Marcello Carlin)
Uno Moralez
Coming Up For Air (Matt Forsythe)
my love for you is a stampede of horses
It's Nice That
Song, by Toad
In Focus
WTF [podcast]
The Rest is Noise (Alex Ross)
My Daguerreotype Boyfriend
The Hood Internet

things we like in Montreal
st-viateur bagel
café olimpico
Euro-Deli Batory
le pick up
kem coba
le couteau
au pied de cochon
mamie clafoutis
tourtière australienne
chez boris
alati caserta
vices & versa
+ paltoquet, cocoa locale, idée fixe, patati patata, the sparrow, pho tay ho, qin hua dumplings, caffé italia, hung phat banh mi, caffé san simeon, meu-meu, pho lien, romodos, patisserie guillaume, patisserie rhubarbe, kazu, lallouz, maison du nord, cuisine szechuan &c

drawn + quarterly
+ bottines &c

casa + sala + the hotel
blue skies turn black
montreal improv theatre
passovah productions
le cagibi
cinema du parc
pop pmontreal
yoga teacher Thea Metcalfe

Cult Montreal
The Believer
The Morning News
The Skinny