This Song Is An Aftermath
by Dan
Please note: MP3s are only kept online for a short time, and if this entry is from more than a couple of weeks ago, the music probably won't be available to download any more.



RatTail - "Go Green" (demo)

When I was a kid my family moved around a lot, because of work and other things. We had trouble affording to live on our own a lot, so we would live with extended family members, and that would kind of run its course sometimes. I didn't really stay in one place for more than a year. It was good and bad and all that, but I'm only talking about it because of one very specific feeling. I would keep it a secret from everyone I met that I could be leaving forever at any given moment. It was this burning secret that I would keep to myself, and it would lay a thick layer of emotion onto simple interactions. If I was mad at people, it would make me feel better, fuck them I don't need them. If I liked people, if I was in love with someone, I could force that burning secret into the wound and make it hurt even more. This song makes me remember that very specific feeling, of driving away from some place forever. It's early morning, we'd stop for food nearby, and then I'd eat as I watched all the neighbourhood stuff pass through the foggy car window. I'd write shapes or words in the wetness. This song feels like the act of pulling two people apart.

RatTail - "Gasmask" (demo)

Gorgeous, throaty guitar and a thick, fuzzy pulse. I can sleep in this music. Finally, I can sleep.


Posted by Dan at September 25, 2009 3:27 PM


Thank you for sharing such a personal anecdote. The song sounds sooo much better in that context, I understand a little bit more.


Posted by SFCritic at September 27, 2009 12:58 AM

Jeez...I've been reading and listening to STG for years now. And this month I've had Sean tell us about an unnamed influential book found in a wall (9/17) and then Dan tells us about a book he knows too (9/22) ...and then he admits he made it up...and I'm lost - what do I believe here anyway. And yet I know, I trust this site, and you give me great music, and you entertain the shit out of me...and I wonder just when the lies/fiction began, ...and then I KNOW I don't care...keep it up. This is one of the best sites anywhere on the web. Thanks again (I've told you b4..)

Posted by J at September 27, 2009 12:33 PM

Dear Dan,
Thanks for sharing :)

Posted by Annie at September 27, 2009 8:52 PM

This is lovely.

Posted by Carina at September 28, 2009 9:20 PM

I really love these stories. In some ways, I find these descriptions of the music far more interesting. You should not telling us stories.

Posted by panoptican at September 29, 2009 8:33 AM

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Sean Michaels is the founder of Said the Gramophone. He is a writer, critic and author of the theremin novel Us Conductors. Follow him on Twitter or reach him by email here. Click here to browse his posts.

Emma Healey writes poems and essays in Toronto. She joined Said the Gramophone in 2015. This is her website and email her here.

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Dan Beirne wrote regularly for Said the Gramophone from August 2004 to December 2014. He is an actor and writer living in Toronto. Any claim he makes about his life on here is probably untrue. Click here to browse his posts. Email him here.

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